Gobble Hop is Thanksgiving! Although this holiday is most often associated with football, for the third year in a row I bring you an article in which this day is dedicated to the Phillies.
Phyllis Thanksgiving Story
Did you know that the Philadelphia Phillies have never lost on Thanksgiving? Sounds impossible, but it’s true!
That’s a lot better than their Halloween record of the Phillies losing every game they played. I won’t even talk about Memorial Day, the holiday the Phillies have lost countless games over the years, including a loss to the Blue Jays, a team from Canada! – in 2022.
Salute of Turkey Stearnes
What better way to enjoy Thanksgiving than talking about a guy called Turkey? Most readers are probably not familiar with Norman “The Turk” Stearns, but he was one of the greatest players in the Negro League. The 18-year Hall of Fame outfielder’s career included one season with the Philadelphia Stars. Unfortunately, this was the only season in five years that he did not make the All-Star team.
Now that Major League Baseball recognizes Negro League accomplishments, he shares the record for the most times he has led his league in threes with six. This feat, along with his two batting titles and a career OPS of 1,034, was enough to merit an induction into the Hall of Fame in 2000.
Scenes from the Phyllis Thanksgiving Party
John Middleton hosted a pre-Thanksgiving party for several members of the Phillies. Thanks to my top-secret source in the organization, I got a transcript of the event.
Around the table were John Middleton, Dave Dombrowski, Sam Fuld, Kevin Long and JT Realmuto.
Middleton: I would like to thank you all for joining me tonight. Because we had such a great year, I wanted to throw a special dinner to celebrate. First, a special mention to Dave Dombrowski, who not only put together the pennant-winning team, but also planned the event.
Dombrovsky: A big Thanksgiving dinner is what winning organizations do. You must have been doing this for years!
Middleton: The guy who came before you told me we don’t have to spend money on Thanksgiving dinner. He said he couldn’t compete with the Dodgers’ dinner, so we shouldn’t even bother.
DombrovskyA: Fortunately, those days are over. And to make sure it was the best dinner, I spared no expense.
Middleton: Spare no money? Wait, I said we have limits…
Dombrovsky: Restrictions? Restrictions exist for teams like the Marlins. Do you want to be like the Marlins?
Fuld: Nobody wants to be like the Marlins, Dave.
Middleton: Well… of course not, but I’m worried about how much it all costs. Can I see the invoice?
DombrovskyA: If you insist. (Hands him a detailed bill)
Middleton: How much did you spend? And look at the tax!
DombrovskyA: Like I said, winners don’t worry about taxes. Right, Sam?
Fuld: Absolutely, Dave. Never worry about tax.
Middleton: But if we spend that much this year, I don’t know how many resources we’ll have for years to come.
Dombrovsky: Years ahead? You don’t have to worry about the years ahead! Just worry about how much fun you are having this year! Maybe the future will still be good? Maybe it won’t happen and some of us will just go somewhere else like Nashville and make others think about what to do this year. Right, Sam?
Fuld: Sounds like a great plan, Dave!
Dombrovsky: I think we should give special thanks to Kevin Long. I saw this potato in the store and it didn’t look good. But Kevin said he could fix them.
Long: (Gives Dombrovsky a plate of mashed potatoes) What do you think?
Dombrovsky: (tastes potatoes) Hey, that’s good! What do you think, Sam?
Fuld: You are 100% right, Dave. They are good.
Dombrovsky: You know, green beans haven’t worked for me before, could you take a look at that too?
Long: I’ll try! (Goes to the kitchen with beans)
RealmutoMr. Middleton, I just wanted to say that I appreciate your invitation to this dinner on behalf of the players.
Middleton: Sure, JT When you’re the best catcher in baseball, you get special perks. By the way, I have something that will make this dinner even better for you.
Realmuto: What is it?
Middleton: They invented this special juice that, when put into the hand, makes any Thanksgiving meal taste better. And I wanted you to be the first to try it. (Hands Realmuto a syringe)
RealmutoA: Wow, that sounds amazing. (He is about to inject the syringe into his hand, but stops just before he gets to his hand.) Wait a second… Is this the COVID vaccine? I won’t buy it!
Middleton: Ha, okay, you got me. But I’ll get you one of these days!
Enter Kevin Long with a bowl of green beans.
Long: I think I understood something. What do you think?
Dombrovsky: (trying) Mmm… much better. You did it again! What do you think, Sam?
Fuld: You’re right as always, Dave.
Rob Thomson enters the room with a platter of turkey.
Thomson: Here’s a turkey.
Middleton: Turkey? But I didn’t hear the timer chime.
ThomsonA: I decided that it was done and I need to get out now.
Middleton: Are you sure? It seemed like it was really cooking. It feels like you may have made a mistake by choosing it earlier.
Thomson: (Shrugs) Eh. This is how I’ve been doing it all year, so why stop now?
Middleton: (chuckling) It’s our Philadelphia Rob! Dig everyone!
There was a time this year when it looked like the Phillies would never make it back to the playoffs. But not only did they make the playoffs, they even earned a National League pennant. Moreover, I witnessed the final game of the NLCS, which was one of the most iconic moments in the history of the franchise.
Being a Phillies fan hasn’t always been easy, and most of the last ten years have been terrible. But every once in a while, the franchise delivers those moments that make you thankful that you’re a Phyllis fan.
On behalf of all The Good Phight staff, I would like to wish you and your families a Happy Thanksgiving!